Have you ever witnessed two ducks get into a fight? Yeah, well, neither have I.

Why do I ask? Well, I’m “reading” a book in true VA fashion (audio style) which is turning out to be quite significant for me. I recently finished a chapter that detailed a pivotal lesson, in such a humorous fashion, I simply had to share.

According to Eckhart Tolle in A’ New Earth’, the aforementioned duck brawl would go something like this…

After two ducks get into a fight (which apparently never lasts very long) they separate and float off in opposite directions. Each will then flaps their wings vigorously a few times to release surface energy built-up during the fight. After flapping, they each float off peacefully as if nothing ever happened.

Now, if the ducks had a human mind, this little tiff would be kept alive loooooong after the fight ended. How you say? By the uniquely human tendency, and ability to, well…think. If the ducks were human, their thoughts after the fight might go something like this…

“I don’t believe what he just did!” ” He came within 5 inches of me.” “He thinks he owns this pond!!” “She has no consideration for my personal space.” “I will never trust him/her again!!” “I’m not going to stand for this.” “I will teach him a lesson he won’t forget.” And on, and on, and on….their mind would keep spinning their story, thinking about it days…months…even years later.

Unfortunately, most of us are stuck in this thought pond, or know a couple folks that live their life this way. For us humans, these thoughts are driven and kept alive by our EGO. And, as far as the body is concerned, the fight is still continuing as long as you leave them on ‘repeat’. You see the energy generated by these negative thoughts–in turn generates negative emotions–which in turn then generates more negative thoughts.

No event ever ends in such a mind, to the point that the event becomes a part of ones identity…kept alive by thoughts…aka the ego…or the mini me. I mean, how many friendships and/or relationships have ended because of ego?? In other words, a failure of folks to flap their wings, shake it off, walk it out….you get the gist…

What is the lesson you ask?

Well, it tis all about letting go of resentment, guilt and perceived grievances. In other words, emotional and mental baggage. At the end of the day, we are all giving this whole navigating life thing, our very best go. And to err is human…and always divine.

At the end of the day, all we can ever truly be defined by is the present moment. Everything else is but a story…about the past or the future…kept alive by our thoughts, which are generated by our ego. If we are not careful, these stories (our stories) can become a part of our identity. That is to say, the stories become how we define ourselves….and just as critically, how we engage (or not) with others.

Be gentle with yourself and others…In other words…Flap your wings folks….vigorously if need be.

…don’t say I never learnt you nothing…;-)

by Victoria Anderson

Victoria is a Human Resources Professional, and currently works as a HR Manager for General Mills—Yoplait Division. Prior to joining General Mills, she spent 4 years as a HR Manager with Pepsi. Victoria received her Master’s Degree from the University of Illinois (Urbana-Champaign) in HR Management & Labor Relations; and her Bachelors of Science in Industrial/Organization Psychology from ISU.

For kicks, she enjoys spending traveling, writing, spending time with friends, and trying just about anything new.